hiiiiiiiii!! today i skipped school since some students were taking the psat we were all gonna be trapped in home room for the WHOLE day other than like 50 minutes.. yeah no so i stayed home! （︶^︶）(no favicon day sos ^_^)

my dad took me to this chinese-japanese restaurant cus on monday i was being a little brat about wanting beef bao buns so he took me so i could shut up (kidding he loves me :3) i got some noodles and they were good! i can maybe show a picture since theres one online 

i think the irl one was prettier tho! the bowl was huge but it was really good! i started crying from how good it was (it was just super spicy and i couldnt handle it) (lll￢ω￢) but i wish they'd put more vegetables cus the leeks made it taste sooooo good! my dad got this singaporean fried rice and it tasted like regular fried rice but with the maruchan beef ramen seasoning packet in it (if that makes sense) 

we also go the beef bao buns but in all honesty i didnt like them that much 〒▽〒 the filling was too heavy for my stomach but the dough was nice (。・ω・。)  it kinda made my body churn(?) like my stomach was telling me if i keep eating this im gonna combust. ╮(╯▽╰)╭

i also got a fortune cookie!!! i keep the paper cus i wanted to quote it here but i lost it so i'll just try to explain what it said. it basically said that monday was the day that i should try to achieve my dreams! they also gave me some orange slices and they were AMAZING. they were enhanced or something cus they were so juicy and flavorful and i think it rlly balanced out all the heavy stuff i had (◔◡◔)

i also baked cookies yesterday but i accidentally poured too much vanilla extract so i added a bunch of instant coffee to see if it could cancel the sweetness but that just made them so delicious and addicting i literally gave myself 5 pimples cus i kept eating the cookies..<(＿　＿)>  i also didnt have enough flour so they baked a little weird so i just put them in the freezer for another rainy day

am i turning into a food blogger omg 

today i also saw on my friends story something about how you dont have to talk to someone 24/7 for you to love them and that love doesnt equal dependency and it got me thinking abt ykw who.. (ik i said ill stop talking about him but its my blog and i do waht i want okay :(( ) and its like i guess im just going to have to trust he still loves me even if we dont talk. maybe the same way he's potentially trusting me too? if he ever reads this, dont worry i still love youu!! so much!!! maybe even more now since he's left me yearning for him for so long /(ㄒoㄒ)/~~

then i had to do a HELLL load of work after. like this time im not kidding i did some of it and i still have to do a load moreeee. i told my friend id do her math hw but i couldt since i couldnt find the naswers anywhere online and i was about to sit there and learn the whole unit (spoiler alert i tried) and i still have to study for my dance theory test tmmrw ¬_¬

also today was sooooo beautiful! i wish i took a picture but it reminded me of IU's Lilac!!!! pretty song for a pretty day 

~o( =∩ω∩= )m

thank you for reading guys hope ill see you next time >3<!!

Ai to Highball Song Analysis!

click here to listen to the song ->   

two posts in a day omg who is she??????????

so today i was listening to ai to highball (an amazing song) and i figured i should do a song analysis because why not

i really liked this song, so i was searching for others like it and searching 'songs like ai to highball' wasnt helping. almost all songs i got from searching that were more happy go lucky than the more somber sound the song has. while yes it is upbeat, i dont feel happy listening to it. it gives me a more melancholy feeling. and sort of a nostalgia? kinda like ive felt whatever this song is trying to convey.

now before i even thought about doing this, i only remembered the lyrics talking about how 'my underwear is wet' (not a fake sub thats an actual line) and i was associating that song with sex and it gave me a picture of like a couple doing it for the first time but yk since its they're first time its a little inexperienced/awkward now pls dont think im weird cus i was thinking of me and my bf so i kept associating it with us since we have not done anything of the sort yet (or maybe ever idek) but enough about that

after some time studying the lyrics i got the impression this song is about a guilty pleasure due to lines like 'Even if you say it's impure' 'God, just let me have this night' 'I know it’ll only make the emptiness grow' 'Just let me off the hook a little' 'I still want to drown a little' - i also think that that the guilty pleasure IS sex since it has some suggestive/not-even-suggesting-just-straight-shouting-it-at-you lyrics. 

so i think the story is that our MC/whoever the song's perspective feels lonely and often drinks his sorrow away (due to all the lines referring to drinking) and he meets this girl/person that kinda opens his heart(?) - 'Your kindness soaked into my withering heart. And a strong highball brings me back to life' and they start fucking and for some reason, the MC is guilty about it. the line that especially draws my attention is the 'God, just let me have this night' this could potentially hint to the guilt being due to religion since in christianity its a sin to fuck before marriage but thats the only i know about. anyway now that i think about it, it is most likely that since he even suggests that what they're doing is 'impure'.

i just thought of how the lyrics constantly mention drowning like for example 'Will I drown in booze again?' 'Honestly, I just want to drown a little' - perhaps this is referring to him 'drowning' in his sin. with the alcoholism and his new 'guilty pleasure' they know they shouldn't be doing this but it feels too good to stop. and the 'I know it’ll only make the emptiness grow' is insinuating that they know that the good feeling only lasts a certain amount of time and that once the ecstasy is gone, they'll feel sorrowful once again. and even more yearnful for/dependent on the guilty pleasures to feel good or alive again.

also little thing i forgot to mention before is that the post-chorus interlude(?) is sounding like its trying to run away idk how to explaining but it just sounds like its running away from the rest of the song which is a cool detail to consider since the mc is kinda running away from taking responsibility for what they've done.

the singer's 'ahhhhhhhahahah' before the chorus also sounds so good and fitting since this mc is clearly stressed out. but also props to these vocals they are MOTHER

idk how accurate the english translation is but heres the site i used! - ai to highball english lyrics

anyway thats just my take on it! im sad i cant find any song like it cus this song is such a masterpiece and i love listening to it

disney trip o(〃＾▽＾〃)o

disney castle!!!

hiiiiii!! i didnt post as soon as i got back cus i was really tired and didnt want to sit after sitting for like 7 hours 

we left for florida on thursday and we stayed at my aunt's house and i had such an unpleasnt sleep cus she has a ferret and they're nocturnal so he was up all night banging on his cage and i was sleeping RIGHT next to him. technically not sleeping since i COULDNT but we had brazilian barbeque (idk what else to call it) and it was pretty good! 

then on friday we were staying at one of the hotels and it had a waterpark in the package(?) but i was in a bad mood cus i was rlly homesick  so i didnt even get to enjoy and i regret it sm cus i love water parks 

saturday was the day we finally went to disney! my parents, my sister and i went to magic kingdom first and it was pretty okay but my aunt is like a disney connoisseur so she's been to all the parks so she was essentially our tour guide. she took my dad and i along with her husband to epcot and it was so cool!!! like mb disney i was not aware of your game..

and look what i got at the japan area/shop!!!! it was $27  but i love her sm shes one of the best materialistic things i have!!!! yk how a lot of ppl associate the hawaiian/tan hello kitty with gyaru so yeah in my eyes shes a gyaru too!!! shes so different from every hello kitty thing ive so far and i love it!!! also cus its a toki doki collab. i dont even like hello kitty but shes such a cutie and i love her and i highkey dont regret it

anyway after epcot we went to hollywood studios where we look at allllll the star wars stuff. im not rlyl into it but my dad and everyone else loves it so we went on two of the simulation rides(?) where you're like emersed/apart of the movie and stuff? it was sooooooooo coool!!! it was so fun i loved it we took pictures with the lightsabers and we look super cute 

then after that we tried to go back to magic kingdom to see the fireworks and we only got to see the end but then we went on the pirates of the Caribbean ride and there was this kinda drop and i THOGUHT that it was abt to launch us into a roller coaster and it was gonna be super intense so i screamed (as you do on a roller coaster) but it was just a tiny drop and it was super smooth sailing afterwards and it super embarrassing cus i was the only who screamed..

so if you use context clues you can see i didnt mention anything abt a break and its cus we didnt have one! we walked for almost 10 hours.  safe to say my feet were HURTING. and i would also like some credit for doing it all in sandals that are kinda heels so i was in extra pain 

yeha that was it but it was super fun i loved it sm!!!!  i never realized how fun disney was but i rlly enjoyed it :333

also off topic but my hair looked so good today! love that for me   and nijirou came out and said that he was feeling better which is so HVEIVGEIVG oh my sweet boy  hes just a little guy pls stop hurting him :((